I'm not sure blocky marines are a good comparison for the slender, pointy Dark Eldar.
A quick google search for red and blue Dark Eldar showed me this guy
. I think it looks good; you could use it as a starting point, and focus on darker blue for the armour. Is this what you meant by blue and red, or did you want to split the armour like 50/50 between the colours?
Another option for checking out colour schemes is to have a look at some of the project logs and the Aphotic Gallery on The Dark City. There's a plethora of material there to look at for inspiration and colour ideas.
I know that the Codex colour scheme for the Lords of Iron Thorn have a blue and red colour scheme, with some silver in as well. Have a look at some of their stuff. You could simply skip out on the silver and replace it with black, or extend the blue or red to fill it in.
As for your comments on the playstyle, you're definitely right that we're glass cannon. Jinking isn't the only way to survive though. Shrewd use of cover and screening units gets us far:
- Putting some Reavers in front of your vehicles give them a 4+ cover save a lot of the time, and the Reavers themselves can jink for 3+ saves as they're skilled riders.
- If one of your skimmers HAS in fact jinked last turn, consider using its flat out move after your other units have fired to put it in front of them so they can get cover saves.
- Usually it's best not to jink with Venoms because they have a 5++ save. If you jink, your opponent can ignore it till his next turn since it's only snap shotting.
Just some food for thought. There's plenty of extra tips and help available on the many tactics threads.