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Spanna uv Komor-AAAGH!
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PostSubject: Return to Paradise   Sat Jun 18 2011, 08:01

Archon Zhuraqir gazed out at the stars so ruthlessly bled dry by the needs of Commoragh. They were unusually active this cycle. One was even flaring. The light hurt his eyes, but he stared unblinking until the rogue solar flare was absorbed by the crystalline radiation buffers surrounding it. It was rare that the slave stars would rage so against their chains. Still, he could understand why the old Solar Cults had resisted his father and the other Houses for so very long. There was a grandness in beholding them even for a moment. Only a moment.

If nothing else, savoring the pain in his eyes would break up the tedium of his wait. Zhuraqir was born into the web of politics that was his father's Court and he had always delighted in the carefully measured manipulation of others. But that masterful art required vast reams of information at his disposal alone, and that meant meeting with merchants of data alone. It meant dealing with the Scourges, delicately.

A bright spot appeared in the corner of his eye. At first the Archon thought his eyes were unfocused after the flare, but the spot only grew larger. It soon resolved into wings. White wings.

That was no ordinary Scourge of the Wicked Truth aerie. Solarite Kharabur himself had come to deliver this missive. Zhuraqir's mind came alive with conjecture. Dozens of possible messages and hundreds of implications wove through his mind even as he greeted the arriving messenger.

"As ever, the efforts of your aerie is appreciated, Solarite. Long may the lowborn look above and know their worthlessness."

The Solarite placed his encoded message into the offered hand. "As ever, your generosity and nobility has been remembered, Archon." Zhuraqir was expecting Kharabur only to finish the ritual greeting set down before either of them had even been born, so the winged trueborn's next words nearly surprised him enough to let it slip. "I have need to call upon it again. The Hellion gangs below have attempted to forget their irrelevance by way of attacks upon my aerie, and their impudence is no longer amusing. I would remind them of the wrath of their betters."

Zhuraqir stood in silent for a moment. "Nothing would please me more than for a few more petty gangs to die in agony. Return in ten cycles and we may discuss how best to ensure our displeasure is clear to even the most addled of the trash."

Kharabur bowed slighty in acknowledgement and jumped off the ledge to return to his aerie. Zhuraqir touched his hand to the poison-coated rune on the missive and pondered the feel of the toxin as the container opened. The pain was like a slow spreading burn followed by the chill of a Mandrake's touch. The Archon opened the stash of antitoxins hidden within his armor and picked out the proper salve. This was a pain he hadn't felt in a while; his spy within the Kabal of Perfection Lost had finally proven himself. The sadistic grin on Zhuraqir's face only grew wider as he decoded the words in his head.
The Wych has decided on a return to Commoragh. His incompetence is clear to the Dracons now. They need only the right push to fall to fighting amongst themselves.

It was perfect. Now it was time to see his plans come to fruition.
It was time for an audience with Asdrubael Vect.

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Last edited by Spanna uv Komor-AAAGH! on Sat Jun 18 2011, 20:07; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Sat Jun 18 2011, 19:48

A perfect start Spanna. Really captures the tone and mood of Commorrites.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Sun Jun 19 2011, 02:33

Nice Spanna. Way better than the first one.
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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Wed Jun 22 2011, 03:41

Lightning played across the dim skies of Commoragh as Zhuraqir and his Court approached the realm of the Kabal of the Black Heart. In the times of the noble houses, Archons would approach the dens of their peers with nothing but their own personal Venom and trusted pilot. It was unseemly to impose a show of force upon another Highborn. Vect changed all that. Now, it was an insult to travel to the lairs of the powerful without a Raider filled with a lethal Court and an armed and ready Dark Lance. Zhuraqir often pondered if that was not simply Kabalite rejection of the glorious traditions of eons past than had caused the shift. It took all of his willpower to not order his gunner to obliterate Vect's waiting guards, and he was entirely aware of the pettiness of such an action. A less controlled Eldar might have revealed himself as Vect's enemy in the one place that it would be simple for the Black Heart Kabal to crush him.

Still, Vect had sent Trueborn to escort the Archon the the Kabalite Court. He had not sent lowborn Kabalites as a calculated insult and he had not presented enough brute force to imply than they were not equals. As gratifying as Zhuraqir found imagining the Sslyth of his Court crushing the Trueborn, he would lose any chance at seeing his plan through. He bowed to the Trueborn in the elaborate style of the Pleasure Cults of old and noted carefully a few who recognized the flourish. They might make sympathetic agents given time. One actually responded in kind and communicated that Vect would be willing to entertain an audience with Zhuraqir before leading the Court towards the pinnacle of the stronghold. At the apex, layered portals twisted open to accept the new guests. Zhuraqir stepped into a scene that he might not have been able to imagine if his father Yaqurzh had not spent so long waxing lyrically about the Old Empire to his children. Beasts and aliens not even Zhuraqir knew the names for swarm around clusters of Eldar constantly shifting in word and deed for momentary advantage. All for the patronage of the Supreme Overlord observing on his throne. All of this was his. And Zhuraqir had helped it come to this.

"The House of Kamurr-Xeth has been held down for far too long by Xelion and his ilk, father. As long as they are secure, we suffer. The fool Vect is a way to weaken them."
His father straightened, at last banishing the illusion of exhaustion he maintained in public. "A slave. You would have me support a slave striking against his betters. I taught you better than this. And you, Qirela. You side with your brother in this?"
"He is not wrong. Moving openly against any of the triumvirate would do nothing but bring the wrath of all three upon our family. But Vect is something different than the Hellion Gangs. They wallow in their squalor and weakness; he cannot accept that he is a pawn on a grander board. Nothing is more predictable than a slave that dreams himself free."
The silence was tortuous. Zhuraqir had begun to think how his father would punish them for wasting his time, when at last Yaqurzh spoke. "So it is. Provide this trash weapons for his petty gang. Guide his wrath towards the right targets, and I may see fit to provide more."
--------------------
He had never seen his father shocked before. "Vect has gone too far. Three Houses are all but obliterated in a single night. Does he have any idea how much use could have been made of those same Houses weakened and fearful? How many millennia of accumulated power and culture that could have been mine!?"
"Son, you must do what you can to annihilate any evidence that we had anything to do with this crudity. We cannot undo words already spread by the tongues of gossips, but perhaps we can banish talk of our lineage enabling Vect to the shifting sands of paranoia. I must make the fool aware of just whom his masters are."


He never saw his father again. From what he would discover over the millennia, Yaqurzh never made it to the dens of Vect's Kabal. The survivors of the Noble Houses had their suspicions about those who had backed the upstart, and Yaqurzh was only one of many who paid for being more easily caught than the Dracon Vect. In time, Vect offered Zhuraqir knowledge of his father's murderers and aid in making them suffer, a deal gladly accepted. But time and again, whatever Vect offered, however much Zhuraqir gained from their allegiance, Vect gained still more. It took thousands of years, but the Kabal of the Shackled Titan was forged out of the broken House Kamurr-Xeth and in the deepening shadow of the Kabal of the Black Heart.

Zhuraqir occasionally wondered why Vect allowed him to live; if the Supreme Overlord was truly so confident that his greed was still so much stronger than his hate or if there was some other purpose there. But for the first time in many cycles, Zhuraqir was not dreaming of a vengeance well-deserved. No, now there was something that Archon Zhuraqir would even grovel before a lowborn upstart to obtain.

At last, the audience began.

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Xelkireth
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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Wed Jun 22 2011, 03:51

That's what you get for funding the upstart!

Pfft...

/VectHate

I am seriously hoping Zhuraqir dies.
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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Wed Jun 22 2011, 20:40

@Xelkireth wrote:
I am seriously hoping Zhuraqir dies.
SPOILERS: He doesn't
Razz

I am thinking of doing the next chapter from the perspective of Vect. I can't think of a better way of explicitly stating why Vect hasn't killed him yet, plus I would like to drop a few hints as to just what Vect has planned for a few of those who are threatening his power.

You guys think I am up to it, or do you think the Vect's inner workings should remain a complete mystery?

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Wed Jun 22 2011, 20:54

@Spanna uv Komor-AAAGH! wrote:
I am thinking of doing the next chapter from the perspective of Vect. I can't think of a better way of explicitly stating why Vect hasn't killed him yet, plus I would like to drop a few hints as to just what Vect has planned for a few of those who are threatening his power.

You guys think I am up to it, or do you think the Vect's inner workings should remain a complete mystery?

Anyone familiar with Vect's profile should assume that he knows the whole score already and is playing his enemies. How far into the story have you thought? I'd prefer to find out why Vect is sparing Zhuraqir as he figures it out for himself. That is assuming that you've planned it that way. Its your call.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Wed Jun 22 2011, 22:22

@Khrivaan wrote:
Anyone familiar with Vect's profile should assume that he knows the whole score already and is playing his enemies. How far into the story have you thought? I'd prefer to find out why Vect is sparing Zhuraqir as he figures it out for himself. That is assuming that you've planned it that way. Its your call.
I've plotted out most of the story so far, and I don't plan to have Vect appear after this. I am treating him as a Mafia boss figure, so Zhuraqir is going to him looking for consent to see his plan out. He doesn't need Vect's permission, but it would warn a lot of rival Kabals off of interfering.

As for explaining why Zhuraqir is still alive, I plan to write him as if he was more concerned with taking advantage of his good fortune than wondering why. He wouldn't try to figure it out, so I need to have it come from the horse's mouth.

Thanks for the feedback.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Thu Jun 23 2011, 02:16

I just had a thought. You could write their discussion first from Zhuraqir's angle, then repeat it from Vect's. It lets you give both sides without jumping around and lets you show Vect's stronger mind. Food for thought. I'd probably be happy with whatever you come up with Razz

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Thu Jun 23 2011, 18:40

I think Vect's mind would be hard to convey. You would have to convey the fact that he is thinking on several levels at once. He may be saying one thing, and then be thinking about several other different things that are completely unrelated.

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PostSubject: A Fractal's Edge   Mon Jun 27 2011, 04:54

"I bring tribute to the Supreme Overlord of All Commoragh!" It was very important that he be loud; the ones he needed to make an impression on were trapped in their gossip at the moment. This would make them take-

"Bring it forth then, Archon."

It seemed that Vect was not in the mood to allow him to accentuate the impact of the moment. So be it. He gestured to the Sslyth of his Court, and they brought forward his captive for Vect's inspection.

Asdrubael Vect was not pleased. Normally, the loquacious Zhuraqir was amusing in his similarity to his parents. But the petty inanities of the Archons vying for his time had worn his patience thin.
"Bring it forth then, Archon."
Interesting. Zhuraqir had failed to suppress the beginnings of a frown. The captured Aspect Warrior he presented as tribute was certainly no small find. His personal breeding vaults, the Incubi, the Wych arenas; many were the purposes he could put her to.
"I accept this gift in the spirit it was intended."
But that was irrelevant against that momentary failure of self control. The Howling Banshee would have induced a dissociative personality to separate herself from her actions, but such a state did not always have to be induced. The House of Kamurr-Xeth has always been one filled with those of unsound minds, and those that survived to lead Kabals had not escaped this heritage.
A full break would take years to mature, and Zhuraqir was not the kind to be able to hide the effects in that time. Vect wondered if Zhuraqir was even aware of the fracturing of his psyche. Unlikely.


"I accept this gift in the spirit it was intended."

Zhuraqir could not have hoped for a better response. Not 'tribute', but 'gift'. Just a little more of a push, and Vect would be grant him a gift of his own. Every Commorite in the chamber would be straining to hear what Vect did, and that is exactly what Zhuraqir needed.

"But the flesh alone would be a poor gift indeed, wouldn't it? I bring news of the greatest importance to your ears as well. The Archon Draickhyde has disregarded his exile and is even now making his way back towards great Commoragh. The Kabal of Perfection Lost will shortly be returned."

Greatest importance indeed. You have informed me of a failing of my spies and a challenge to my authority in front of all of Commoragh. Not fool enough to make yourself my target yet, though. Why then bring it to my attention?
Ah, so that is what you seek. The Kabal of the Shacked Titan is no longer enough; you also seek to pick the corpse of the Kabal your sister founded in hopes of striking against me.
A small enough concession. You will be certain to rid me of your sister's killer and what is left of value for you to plunder will not make you beyond my manipulation.
Only the Solarite Kharabur could have gotten the information to you this quickly, and he would have made you aware of the Hellion attacks on his aerie. It has taken me some time to manipulate the local gangs into open assault on the spires under your protection, but soon you will feel compelled to respond. No son of Yaqurzh would allow a lowborn to insult his allies so, much less a fellow Highborn. But no matter how many Hellions you manage to hunt down, you will fail to stop the transgressions upon your protection until you take your entire Kabal to the streets. Perhaps, with the plunder you hope to obtain, you might even succeed. Carefully managed, the escalation could draw Baron Sarthonyx into committing himself to war with your Kabal, for not even the Helfather could ignore an organized murder of Hellion Gangs without losing face.
Yes, a small enough concession.


"The Kabal of the Shackled Titan stands ready, Lord Vect. Draickhyde and the Kabal of Perfection Lost's effrontery insults not your rule, but the dignity of all of the Twilight City. Grant me leave to defend the Webway Portal, to purge their weakness from the memory of the Dark Eldar. I ask only the honor of protecting Commoragh from thosee unworthy to enter."
This was a victory. A kindness, a veiled insult, and a kindness again was one of the simplest tricks of open negotiation, but it had trapped even Vect. To reject the aid of his Kabal would be to appear the ungrateful fool, unwilling to allow a place for other Kabals even to do Vect's bidding. And he could not do that, not with a pit of vipers hanging on every word. Even they would unite in revolt against the Kabal of the Black Heart if their collective paranoia about Vect's power over them was provoked in such a way. All he could do is what Zhuraqir wanted.

So self-satisfied for one who feels compelled to speak when silence would serve better. You remind me of the mon-keigh historian. He had screamed so at the Haemonculi that he would tell them everything they wanted to know. They had wearied of his noise, but I had yet to learn of the weaknesses of the mon-keigh. He babbled to me as if words were a poison he was expelling. I too grew tired of him as I learned what I needed, and cut out his tongue. The Coven Master said he expired writing out still more in the blood from his mouth.
Depart from me before your usefullness erodes my ability to tolerate the tongue in your mouth.


Vect merely nodded and gestured for Zhuraqir to carry out his will. As Zhuraqir turned his back, he allowed himself the smallest of smiles. Perhaps the other Archons would take it as eagerness, perhaps not. Either way, this was a victory.

Yes, a small enough victory.
For now.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Tue Jun 28 2011, 17:46

Do Dark Eldar call themselves Dark Eldar? They are Eldar, or Commorrites.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Wed Jun 29 2011, 02:47

@Khrivaan wrote:
Do Dark Eldar call themselves Dark Eldar? They are Eldar, or Commorrites.
Check the new DE timeline under A Legacy Begins. Vect and his Black Heart Kabal literally call themselves Dark Eldar (Eladrith ynneas) and they aren't the only ones. Zhuraqir doesn't consider himself a 'Dark' Eldar, but he is dealing with someone who was the first to label himself as such; the niceties must be observed after all.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Wed Jun 29 2011, 08:29

That last one was really well done on Vect's behalf, I think. It really conveys how he is, knowing everything and yet letting others think they have the upper hand.

I may have to keep an eye on this one.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Wed Jun 29 2011, 12:11

@Spanna uv Komor-AAAGH! wrote:
Check the new DE timeline under A Legacy Begins. Vect and his Black Heart Kabal literally call themselves Dark Eldar (Eladrith ynneas) and they aren't the only ones. Zhuraqir doesn't consider himself a 'Dark' Eldar, but he is dealing with someone who was the first to label himself as such; the niceties must be observed after all.

Fair enough.

@Bhariss wrote:
That last one was really well done on Vect's behalf, I think. It really conveys how he is, knowing everything and yet letting others think they have the upper hand.

I concur.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Sat Jul 02 2011, 10:12

So...epic... I really need a Vect roleplay partner.
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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Sun Jul 03 2011, 21:27

@Bhariss wrote:
That last one was really well done on Vect's behalf, I think. It really conveys how he is, knowing everything and yet letting others think they have the upper hand.
That is a big relief. I originally didn't have that last paragraph for Vect, so I was really worrying about how to make it clear that Vect was really thinking that far ahead and I didn't just put his second paragraph in the wrong place. Plus I got to work in a reference to his curiosity, something I doubt most people consider when they think of the Supreme Overlord of Commoragh.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Sun Jul 03 2011, 22:28

You did a great job with Vect. Smile
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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Wed Sep 21 2011, 15:33

O.K., my computer troubles are finally over and I should have the next part up by tomorrow morning. Sorry for the wait.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Wed Sep 21 2011, 15:45

Huzzah!!!
^.^
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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Fri Sep 23 2011, 05:53

So much to do, so little time.

Zhuraqir had won the political wrangling with Vect, but that was only the beginning. The Kabal of the Shackled Titan was his to command, but there were alliances to maintain and debts to call upon. The first and most proud of his allies was the Coven of the Fractal Mirror; failing to offer them a share of the spoils would be a misstep long remembered. He considered ordering his Court to return to his Kabal to avoid antagonizing the Ancient, but decided against it. Kaldyr Xeth was not one to be easily angered, and not even an Archon was safe alone in the under-city.

His Raider plummeted past the countless levels of Higher Commoragh, moving so quickly that the sights and screams all blurred together. Zhuraqir knew that his Court and pilot would be watching below and took the opportunity to crane his neck upwards. Perhaps an attack could come from there, but the convergence of all the light and noise of the Twilight City was an experience worthy of witness on its own. He savored the essence of his City until even the grandeur of the Highborn palaces receded, and he knew he had arrived at the Oubliettes suspended from the underside of Commoragh.

He waved away his Court and entered the lair of Xeth. As ever, the initial corridors were polished to near perfect mirrors, but those gave way to the dank, pulsing arteries at the heart of the Coven's home. Only there did Zhuraqir encounter any life, but he ignored the Wracks about their work. He knew where to go.

Dakyr Xeth was observing the death of some breed of Mon-Keigh when the Archon entered his chamber. He turned to the new arrival and left his Acothyst to its work.

"Have you a more engaging use of my time to suggest, Archon?" The withered and twisted form of the Haemonculus Ancient was at odds with a voice so unaltered. A younger Zhuraqir had been disturbed by the dissonance.

"I do, Ancient. I offer you the pleasure of witnessing the extinction of a Kabal and the challenge of a proper revenge against a traitorous servant."

"The Distorted Reflection? So Perfection Lost is found again."
A bloody mass of gristle hammered against its pod. Xeth allowed himself a slight grin.
"My Coven will delight in granting the false Haemonculus all the rewards her pretension deserves. We shall attend."

Zhuraqir bowed low to Kaldyr Xeth, fighting to keep his eyes from flickering to the thing in the pod.
"The greatness and nobility of the House of Kamurr-Xeth shall be forever preserved in your person."

The Ancient acknowledged the words by widening the shark's grimace that was his smile. He had long ago discarded his lineage for grander things, but his ego still stirred at the flattery of the last son of his House.
"And I shall preserve it in turn. Depart well, Archon."

Zhuraqir lingered for a moment before leaving as he had arrived. Nothing would be gained by asking after his special commission, and he had otherwise gotten all he could have expected.

It was all nearly in place now.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Fri Sep 23 2011, 13:04

That was morning, right?
Wink

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Fri Sep 23 2011, 13:38

Wow, still so epic. I'm kinda hoping Vect makes another appearance!!! He's one of my favorite Dark Eldars, if not the favorite!!! XD
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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Fri Sep 23 2011, 13:54

@Zehra wrote:
Wow, still so epic. I'm kinda hoping Vect makes another appearance!!! He's one of my favorite Dark Eldars, if not the favorite!!! XD
Thank you.

Vect will make another appearance, but that will be in the epilogue three or four stories away. He has better things to do than watch my Archon's feud play out. Take advantage of the aftermath certainly, but I don't want to give the impression that Zhuraqir is anything more than an amusing pawn to Vect.

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PostSubject: Re: Return to Paradise   Fri Sep 23 2011, 14:25

Ah ok!!! Works for me!!! Vect is such a sneaker...XD
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