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 A Distinctly Alien Welcome

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Hasoroth
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PostSubject: A Distinctly Alien Welcome   Mon Jun 06 2011, 04:50

"Welcome to Commorragh"

A shrouded figured entered the room. In truth the room was no better than a cell, nondescript in every possible way except for the figure chained in the far corner. Muscular, scarred and straining at his bonds the naked Astartes struggled in vain to break free of his chains and attack his visitor.

Paying no heed to the exertions of the prisoner the new comer removed his hood, displaying a pale face that, despite the multitude of tattoos that masked its finer details, was unmistakably Eldar in heritage.

"Please cease your attempts to escape human." drawled the stranger.

With a reluctant sigh reminiscent of the silent aftermath of an explosion the Space Marine settled on the floor cross legged. Still he remained silent.

Unperturbed the tattooed visage continue to speak.

"I have many names human. Many titles. But you may call me Abban, or father if you desire to be formal. I prefer father, it is what I am after all."

Abban crossed over to the imprisoned Astarte, long graceful steps covering the distance in scant seconds. Pausing for a moment to unclasp his hood the alien mimicked his prisoner and carefully sat opposite the Space Marine.

"I see your astonishment." the xeno continued "My kin come with the reputation of daemons do they not? And yet I speak in soft words as you lie, sober and cared for. Forgive me the chains but warriors of your prowess come with reputations as fearsome as ours."

At this Abban laughed, a crystal clear expression of genuine warm mirth. He struggled to control his laughter but after a sustained burst of coughs the alien lord managed to regain control of his tempers.

"You cannot talk, I am afraid in the excitement of the fight you were shot in the jaw by one of your compatriots. However, there is no cause to worry my friend! My physicians have already injected the little builders into your bloodstream and even as we speak your skeletal structure is being repaired."

Silence reigned. The Astarte had not moved save to lock his eyes with those of his captors. Although he could not vocalize it the Space Marine felt a flicker of apprehension as he realized the alien's eyes were devoid of color, oily black like those belonging to a deep ocean predator.

Seemingly unconcerned Abban continued the one sided conversation, pausing only to readjust his body into a more languorous pose on the cold cell floor.

"For what purpose do I keep you alive?" he asked rhetorically "That is the question burning in your mind, yes? You are strong but I doubt your pride would allow you to work quietly as a bonded servant for one of the clans. You are a great warrior amongst your people, a brother of the stars I believe they call your kind? Yet I doubt you will fight for the Shattered Hopes be it on a raider or in the trial pits. So why do I keep you here? Well as to that my friend, you serve a very special purpose."

The alien's voice began to rise in clarity and gravity.

"Your incredible physique allows you to suffer great physical pain, and your mental barriers are if anything, even more formidable. I can honestly say that in you lays your species greatest hope, you are an evolved specimen that can withstand the encroaching decay of this galaxy and turn it back."

This time the pause in Abban's monologue was sinister. The seemingly-genuine warmth in his voice shattered and the alien's cold cruelty seeped into his words, twisting the Low Gothic issuing forth from his lips into barbed sounds, sounds that promised pain.

"This makes it so much more exhilarating when I break you." the alien smiled but his mouth held no teeth, only fangs "I will not do so with the application of a soul-scourge or a nerve burner. Oh no. My tools of choice are pleasant conversations and disarming honesty. I will break you, but you will never know it. I will make you divulge your secrets, make you renounce your faith, and betray everything you ever stood for with your thoughts and your words."

Abban rose. He gathered his cloak around him and made as if to leave the forlorn prison. Shrugging his hood into place the Archon's malicious smile faded and he turned to face his prisoner once more.

"Why do I tell you this? You see, as you lay comatose on the surgical tables of my physicians I had a mind slayer implanted within your skull and when I leave it will remove all memory of this conversation from your brain. When I enter your room for what seems like the first time tomorrow my real work begins. And when I have made you turn from everything you currently hold dear I will remove the mind-slayer and you will remember this exact moment when I promised the corruption of your soul."

Sneering, Abban turned and exited the cell.

The screams followed him even as the jail door slammed shut.


Last edited by Hasoroth on Wed Jun 15 2011, 01:56; edited 2 times in total
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Xelkireth
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PostSubject: Re: A Distinctly Alien Welcome   Mon Jun 06 2011, 05:57

Interesting work. It reminds me very much of something akin to A Torturer's Tale.
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Spanna uv Komor-AAAGH!
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PostSubject: Re: A Distinctly Alien Welcome   Tue Jun 14 2011, 03:17

@Xelkireth wrote:
Interesting work. It reminds me very much of something akin to A Torturer's Tale.
Me too, and in a good way.

Physical pain certainly nourishes the Dark City, but I'd imagine the Haemonculus would savor mental agony much, much more than GW says. If nothing else, they would value it as a luxurious taste for the effort they have to put into inflicting it.

I only have pitifully petty point: Abban's greeting shouldn't be 'Good evening.' For one, there is no day or night in the Dark City. For another, one simple way to disorient and distress a (human)captive is to distort their sense of time and prevent them from knowing when and where they are. A Haemonculus who delights in breaking his captives with words wouldn't make the mistake of implying a time.

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Hasoroth
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PostSubject: Re: A Distinctly Alien Welcome   Tue Jun 14 2011, 03:27

You know I did not consider that all, I was trying to think of the least likely thing a Dark Eldar torturer would say in a disconcerting manner. Do you have a suggestion on what I could replace it? I was thinking perhaps a simple "Welcome" could be a good change?
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Spanna uv Komor-AAAGH!
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PostSubject: Re: A Distinctly Alien Welcome   Tue Jun 14 2011, 10:22

@Hasoroth wrote:
You know I did not consider that all, I was trying to think of the least likely thing a Dark Eldar torturer would say in a disconcerting manner. Do you have a suggestion on what I could replace it? I was thinking perhaps a simple "Welcome" could be a good change?
Given the title of your story, 'Welcome' fits perfectly. However, if you want to tie it in with the mind-slayer ending more, you could have him say something like 'Remember' or 'I never lie'. Or both.

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Xelkireth
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PostSubject: Re: A Distinctly Alien Welcome   Tue Jun 14 2011, 10:53

Spanna must have a mind-reading device in my brainpan. *sigh*
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Khrivaan
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PostSubject: Re: A Distinctly Alien Welcome   Wed Jun 15 2011, 01:22

I wouldn't use "welcome" by itself. It would sound as if the subject is visiting Abban when it is clearly the other way around.

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Beaviz81
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PostSubject: Re: A Distinctly Alien Welcome   Wed Feb 01 2012, 10:42

I would have used greetings instead of welcome.
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